the speech impediment of the 21st century (by Marc Johns)
I’ll fuck you up buddy this is not a speech impediment it’s linguistic evolution!! the existence of the phrase “Aisha was like” allows the speaker to convey whatever Aisha said without making the listener assume they’re quoting Aisha directly while still maintaining the FEELING of what Aisha said.
ie, Aisha said she didn’t want to go out with me VERSUS Aisha was like, “I’d rather kiss a Wookie”.
the addition of “XYZ was like” lets the speaker be more expressive and efficient and it is a totally valid method of communicating information!!
With the way language has evolved, this is one of the few ways I can even think of to express in casual conversation what someone said.
"So I said to Aisha," is certainly used, but if you remove the "so," which implies casual tone ("and" can be used in the same way), you get
"I said to Aisha," which is really formal in most English dialects/variations. I don’t know about all, but in New England dialects, you sound like you’re reading aloud from a novel.
"I told Aisha," is really only used when you continue to describe, not tell, what you told her. Ex: "I told Aisha that James was too punk for her" works while, "I told Aisha, ‘James is too punk for you’" crosses the line back into formalness of the "I said."
Things like “I asked” or “I answered [with]” are similar levels of casual and efficient to the “So, I said [or say, as many conversations about the past take place in present tense anyway, as if the speaker is giving a play-by-play in the moment]” but are specific to only certain situations.
"I was like, 'Marc Johns, what is your obsession with restoring archaic speech patterns and interfering with the natural progression of English from complex to efficient?'" envelopes all of these easily and is accessible and crisp, and allows for more variations on inflection than the others.
Of course, James is probably like, “I already fucking said that.” But eh, I tried adding on.
if you ever try to befriend me and you expect to be in frequent contact with me i am so sorry. i do that with maybe two people and even then i often go days or weeks withouts saying anything before talking daily for a while.
A radical feminist’s recollections and critiques of her past experiences in a BDSM lifestyle…
Here’s a feminist blog where a former sub and now radical feminist claims that BDSM is evil, misogynistic, etc. I know I have a lot of kinksters in my audience. What do you think of her page?
I’ll offer my own opinions if this discussion gets going good.
*sigh* The author of this blog is beyond rational discussion because she has betrayed a few extremely simple rules for strengthening ones argument.
This shows that she doesn’t care about the truth of matters and is for one reason or another looking to demonize an extremely diverse community of people.
What are those betrayals of argumentative ethics?
She has pointed out the exception within the BDSM community to paint the entire entire community in one broad stroke.
She has misrepresented fantasies of those within the community as realities.
She has wrongly assumed these broad generalizations can even begin to define the entire gamut of human sexuality which is explored within these communities.
So she has used exceptions to garner reaction. She has Misrepresented fantasies and judged people on their darkest thoughts, and she makes the assumption that her experience is the only valid experience.
My take on the BDSM community
The authors viewpoints aside, there is nothing mentally askew in exploring the darker side of human sexuality. It does not enforce a non-consensual power structure either.
Actual BDSM involves consent 100% of the time. No coercion. No unhealthy imbalances of power. No rape or abuse of any kind.
If someone gets off from being slapped or hung upside down while they’re whipped… You nor I, nor fucking anyone, especially the aforementioned blog author has any right to say otherwise. My autonomy over my sexuality and body are mine and mine alone to decide.
On community sites you will very often find groups of people exploring fantasies revolving around females taking control, or men taking control, or people who identify as neither taking control.
In ANY community you will have those that don’t play by the rules. The dregs of the community who are pretty objectively bad people. These hilariously enough, are also the examples used to demonize the community.
Much like ANY community you will have abusive and unhealthy people. The BDSM community has its fair share of course but so does every single other community on the face of the planet.
Anyways, there’s a lot to talk about, but the blogs author is full of shit. BDSM is not anti-woman nor is it sexist in the least. I’ve been to the same forums she’s talked about and the examples she’s given (the worst ones) are of people who our banned fairly often.
On a side note, I don’t feel any fantasy no matter how perverse is unacceptable. So long as someone follows the principle of doing no non-consensual harm I don’t feel there is any issue with what people keep locked in their heads.
Wow. I might not even have to do my own response now. That was nearly everything I was going to say.
1 yard of patterned fabric (I suggest a polka dot-type pattern so it looks like suction cups)
1 medium piece of black felt, 1 medium piece of white felt (for the eyes)
white thread, black thread and thread of the same color as the felt you’re using
about 5 lbs. of stuffing
a couple big sheets of paper to draw your pattern
You can find many of these things down at the many places on Fabric Row, on 4th Street between Bainbridge and Catherine. Pearl, at 417 South Street, sometimes has stuffing if you can’t find any.
First, you need to draw out your patterns. Here’s a basic template to get you started, although most of the measurements are reasonably fudgeable. If in the likely event you don’t have any four-foot-long pieces of paper lying around, just tape a few pieces together.
Once you’ve drawn out your eight patterns, it’s time to cut the fabric. Pin the pattern to the fabric, laid flat, and cut out the following, leaving a half an inch or so of extra fabric around the edge of the pattern:
FOR THE ARMS: 8 felt and 8 fabric cutouts of piece 1
FOR THE, UH, LONGER ARMS: 2 felt and 2 fabric cutouts of piece 2
FOR THE BODY: 2 felt cutouts of piece 3
FOR THE FIN: 4 felt cutouts of piece 4
FOR THE HEAD: 1 felt cutouts of piece 6
FOR THE EYES: 2 white felt cutouts of piece 7 and 2 black felt cutouts of piece 8
So now you’ve got all your pieces ready, it’s time to start sewing them together. I did mine by hand because my sewing machine is busted and I get a kind of Zen buzz from sewing by hand, but if you have a non-busted one I recommend that you use it as it will be MUCH EASIER. You’re going to be sewing everything with the nice side of the fabric facing in, then turning it inside out to stuff it.
THE ARMS: (To make a quilted pattern that looks like suckers, see this other post). Pin together one patterned fabric piece 1 and one felt piece 1 (with the nice sides facing the inside). Sew down around the U-shape and back up, leaving the top open. Then turn the arm inside out, stuff it (it’s easiest to do both of these things if you sort of scrunch it up like you’re trying to put on a pair of tights, excuse the non-dude-friendly reference) and sew the top closed. Do the same for the other seven arms and rejoice in the fact that this is the most tedious part. Same deal with the two long arms, they’re just harder to stuff.
THE FINS: Pin together two of your piece 4s and sew together the curvy outer edge. Turn the piece inside out, so the seam you just sewed is on the inside, and start sewing up the other side, stuffing gradually as you go along. You should end up with a triangle-ish puffy thing. Repeat for the other two piece 4s.
THE BODY: Put down one piece 3, then place the two fins you have down with the point up and the curvy side pointing in, then make a sandwich by putting the other piece 3 down on top. Pin it all together and sew around the edges with the two fins still inside, as shown. Turn it inside out and move on to…
THE HEAD: So take piece 6 and the ten arms you’ve already done. Lay the arms, fabric side facing you, out with the arms’ top seams in a line half an inch from the top of piece 6. The order should be arm arm arm arm BIG ARM arm arm arm arm BIG ARM. The legs should be almost entirely covering piece 6. Pin them in place and sew a straight line through the individual legs seams to attach the legs to piece 6.
When you pick up the other side of piece 6, you now have something resembling a really weird untied hula skirt. Sew together the two 9-inch ends of piece 6 with the fabric side of the arms on the outside, and keep it inside out for the moment.
PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER: Fit the open end of the body through the arms (still fabric side facing out) and pull the edge all the way through the felt cylinder so it’s even with the edge that DOESN’T have arms attached to it. Sew around the diameters of the head cylinder and the body cylinder to attach them, then pull the legs down over the head and you’re almost done!
Stuff the body, then seal it off by sewing piece 5 over the open end (even if you do have a functional sewing machine, you’ll probably have to do this part by hand).
THE EYES: Sew the black circles on the white circles and whipstitch the eyes onto the head. You do this last because you can’t tell where they’re going to end up on the end product if you put them on before stuffing the body.